When I took this photo, I thought of my friend, Mary. Not because her ass looks like two loaves of Challah bread trapped in a polyester prison, but because she’s the one who first introduced me to the term “hungry butt.”
Mary isn’t known for her tact, which is why I like her so much. What she is known for is an infamous party trick—the ability to pop her shoulder blades from their sockets, jutting them out behind her like the fins of a ’53 Cadillac. But Mary didn’t stop there. The space created between her shoulder blades was the exact same size as a case of Bud Light. Mary would squeeze that box of brew with her vice-like scapulas as she wandered the room offering a beer to anyone who looked thirsty. Or sober.
Mind you, she performed this marvelous trick without a shirt on, not because she was an exhibitionist per se, but because she claimed the garment prevented her from getting a proper grip. Um, whatever. Frankly, I didn’t even notice the beer at first because her double D bazookas were blocking my view.
Anyway, I had never heard the term “hungry butt” before Mary used it to describe the phenomenon of someone’s pants being devoured by their own ass crack. So when I stumbled upon this unfortunate munching, naturally I thought of her.
Mary, This Butt’s For You.
Shelly
Mary isn’t known for her tact, which is why I like her so much. What she is known for is an infamous party trick—the ability to pop her shoulder blades from their sockets, jutting them out behind her like the fins of a ’53 Cadillac. But Mary didn’t stop there. The space created between her shoulder blades was the exact same size as a case of Bud Light. Mary would squeeze that box of brew with her vice-like scapulas as she wandered the room offering a beer to anyone who looked thirsty. Or sober.
Mind you, she performed this marvelous trick without a shirt on, not because she was an exhibitionist per se, but because she claimed the garment prevented her from getting a proper grip. Um, whatever. Frankly, I didn’t even notice the beer at first because her double D bazookas were blocking my view.
Anyway, I had never heard the term “hungry butt” before Mary used it to describe the phenomenon of someone’s pants being devoured by their own ass crack. So when I stumbled upon this unfortunate munching, naturally I thought of her.
Mary, This Butt’s For You.
Shelly
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